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Love and Relationships

6 Types of Breakups That Get Back Together - The Ultimate Guide

We explore the different types of breakups that are likely to get back together, what can help and hurt your chances, and a little information on the scientific side, as well as, some celebrity success examples.

By

Kenneth Erickson

on

Feb 25, 2023

Types of Breakups That Get Back Together - The Ultimate Guide

  • Breakup types with a chance of more likely getting back together
  • What do do after a breakup to improve chances of reconciliation
  • Research on break ups and getting back together

Indicators to predict whether your relationship can bounce back after a breakup

Breakups are tough, leaving people with a broken heart and a myriad of emotions. As time passes, you may find yourself wondering if there's a chance to rekindle the love you once shared with your ex.

In this article, we'll explore the different types of breakups that are likely to get back together, what can help and hurt your chances, and a little information on the scientific side, as well as, some celebrity success examples.

So, if you're looking to regain that lost connection or simply want to understand more about the dynamics of relationships, we have the information for you here.

1. Mutual Breakups Due to External Factors

Sometimes, life's circumstances force couples to part ways despite still being in love.

Examples of such breakups include long-distance relationships, career changes, or family pressures.

When the external factors change, there's a high chance these couples can work through their issues and reunite.

Time together, post-breakup, will help them realize their love for each other hasn't diminished.

Prince William and Kate Middleton, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge had a brief breakup in 2007, reportedly due to the pressures of their public life and career aspirations. They reconciled a few months later and eventually married in 2011, becoming one of the most famous and beloved royal couples.

Managing a breakup due to external factors can be challenging, as the emotions involved may still be strong, and the desire to be together may persist.

Here are some tips to help you navigate this type of breakup:

  • Acknowledge the situation: Accept that external factors have led to the breakup and that it may be necessary for the time being. Recognizing the circumstances can help you better understand and process the emotions involved.
  • Maintain open communication: If possible, keep the lines of communication open with your ex-partner. Discuss the external factors that led to the breakup and express your feelings openly and honestly. This can help maintain a strong connection and provide support for one another.
  • Set boundaries: While it's important to maintain communication, it's also essential to set boundaries to protect your emotional well-being. Establish limits on how often you will communicate and the topics you will discuss to ensure a healthy balance.
  • Focus on personal growth: Use this time apart to work on self-improvement and growth. Developing new skills, pursuing hobbies, and expanding your social circle can help you feel more fulfilled and better prepared for the future, whether or not you reunite with your ex.
  • Stay positive: Try to maintain a positive outlook on the situation. Focus on the aspects of your life that you can control and remember that circumstances can change over time.
  • Seek support: Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist to help you process your emotions and navigate the challenges of the breakup.
  • Be patient: Remember that external factors can change, and there may be an opportunity to rekindle the relationship in the future. However, be prepared for the possibility that the circumstances may not change or that you may grow apart during this time.
  • Plan for the future: If there's a possibility that the external factors may change, discuss potential plans with your ex-partner for how you might approach a reunion. Having a clear understanding of each other's expectations can help ease the transition if you decide to get back together.
  • Evaluate your feelings: As time passes, regularly reassess your feelings and desires. Ensure that your motivation to get back together stems from genuine love and compatibility rather than fear of being alone or the comfort of familiarity.
  • Be open to change: If you ultimately decide to get back together, be prepared to adapt and adjust to the new circumstances. Recognize that both you and your partner may have changed during the time apart and be willing to embrace these changes for a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.

2. Breakups for Personal Growth

Some breakups occur because one or both partners need time and space for personal growth. This type of break often happens when people feel their self-esteem is dwindling or when they need to focus on self-care. If both individuals work on themselves and evolve, they may eventually want to be together again. Seeking the help of a therapist can help in this journey.

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel: This celebrity couple experienced a breakup in 2011, citing the need for personal growth and focusing on their careers. They got back together after a few months and married in 2012. Today, they are still going strong and have two children together.

Managing a breakup due to personal growth needs can be a challenging and emotional process. Here are some tips to help you navigate this type of breakup and foster self-improvement:

  • Accept the need for growth: Acknowledge that personal growth is essential for both you and your partner. Embrace the opportunity to learn more about yourself and make positive changes in your life.
  • Give each other space: Allow both yourself and your ex-partner the time and space needed to focus on individual growth. This distance can help you gain new perspectives and insights about yourself and the relationship.
  • Set personal goals: Identify areas in your life where you'd like to grow and set achievable goals. This could include emotional development, career advancement, or improving your physical health.
  • Seek support: Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist for guidance and encouragement as you work on your personal growth. Surrounding yourself with a supportive network can help you stay motivated and committed to your goals.
  • Engage in self-reflection: Take the time to reflect on the reasons behind the breakup and the aspects of yourself that you'd like to improve. Use this knowledge to create a plan for personal development.
  • Pursue new interests and hobbies: Use this time to explore new activities, passions, and social circles. This can help you gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your desires in life and relationships.
  • Practice self-compassion: Be kind to yourself during this period of growth and change. Recognize that personal development is an ongoing process, and it's natural to experience setbacks and challenges.
  • Maintain healthy boundaries: While working on personal growth, it's essential to establish and maintain boundaries with your ex-partner. This can help prevent unhealthy patterns from resurfacing and ensure that you're focused on your self-improvement.
  • Reassess the relationship: As you progress in your personal growth journey, regularly evaluate your feelings towards the relationship and your ex-partner. Consider whether getting back together would be beneficial for both of you or if continuing on separate paths is the best option.
  • Be open to change: If you ultimately decide to reunite with your ex-partner, approach the relationship with an open mind and a willingness to adapt. Recognize that both of you have grown during your time apart and be prepared to embrace the changes in your relationship dynamics.

Related Article: Self-Care Confidence Boost | Level Up Your Attractiveness

3. Amicable Breakups

Amicable breakups happen when couples realize they have different attachment styles or life goals but still maintain a strong bond of friendship.

The mutual respect they share for each other's wellbeing and the support from mutual friends can make it a good idea for them to get back together in the future, especially if they manage to address the issues that led to the breakup.

Managing a breakup due to amicable reasons, such as attachment styles or life goals, can be particularly challenging when there's still a strong attraction between both parties.

Here are some tips to help you navigate this situation:

  • Acknowledge the reasons: Accept the amicable reasons behind the breakup and recognize that sometimes love alone may not be enough to sustain a healthy relationship. Understanding the root causes can help you process your emotions and find closure.
  • Maintain open communication: Keep the lines of communication open with your ex-partner, discussing your feelings and thoughts on the relationship. Honest and respectful conversations can help maintain a supportive connection and clarify expectations for the future.
  • Set boundaries: Establish clear boundaries to protect your emotional well-being and prevent blurred lines between friendship and romance. This might involve limiting the frequency of contact or avoiding discussions about potential romantic partners.
  • Focus on personal growth: Use this time to work on self-improvement and address any personal issues that may have contributed to the breakup. This can help you become a better partner in the future, whether with your ex or someone new.
  • Seek support: Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist for guidance and emotional support as you navigate this challenging situation.
  • Allow yourself to grieve: Even if the breakup was amicable, it's natural to feel a sense of loss and sadness. Give yourself permission to grieve the end of the relationship and practice self-compassion during the healing process.
  • Pursue new interests and social connections: Engage in new hobbies, activities, and social circles to help you gain a fresh perspective and create new memories separate from your ex-partner.
  • Be patient: Recognize that healing and moving on from an amicable breakup with a strong attraction may take time. Be patient with yourself and avoid rushing into a new relationship or rekindling the old one until you feel emotionally ready.
  • Reevaluate the relationship: As time passes, reassess your feelings and desires regarding the relationship. Ensure your motivation to get back together or maintain a friendship stems from a healthy place and not just the lingering attraction.
  • Be open to change: If you ultimately decide to rekindle the relationship or maintain a friendship, be prepared to adapt and adjust to the new dynamics. Recognize that both you and your partner may have changed during your time apart and embrace these changes for a healthier, more fulfilling connection.

4. Breakups Due to Mental Health Issues

At times, couples break up because one or both partners are struggling with mental health issues that affect their relationship.

If they seek professional help and work on their mental health, there's a possibility they can move forward and reunite as a stronger, more understanding couple.

Managing a breakup due to mental health issues can be a complex and sensitive process.

Here are some tips to help you navigate this type of breakup and support your own well-being:

  • Educate yourself: Learn about the specific mental health issues involved, their symptoms, and potential treatment options. Understanding the challenges faced by your ex-partner can help you process the breakup and empathize with their situation.
  • Prioritize self-care: Focus on your own well-being and practice self-care to ensure you maintain your physical, emotional, and mental health during this challenging time.
  • Establish boundaries: Set clear boundaries with your ex-partner to protect your emotional well-being and allow both of you the space needed to heal and focus on mental health.
  • Seek support: Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist for guidance and emotional support. Surrounding yourself with a strong support network can help you cope with the challenges of the breakup.
  • Be patient and understanding: Recognize that mental health recovery is an ongoing process and may take time. Be patient with your ex-partner and yourself as you both navigate this challenging period.
  • Focus on personal growth: Use this time to work on self-improvement and address any personal issues that may have contributed to the breakup or been impacted by your partner's mental health struggles.
  • Maintain open communication: If possible and appropriate, keep the lines of communication open with your ex-partner. Honest and respectful conversations can help maintain a supportive connection and provide closure.
  • Encourage professional help: If your ex-partner is not already receiving professional help, gently encourage them to seek therapy or other mental health resources.
  • Be prepared for change: Recognize that both you and your ex-partner may change during the recovery process. Be open to the possibility that the dynamics of your relationship may shift, and the future may be uncertain.
  • Reflect on your own mental health: Use this experience as an opportunity to evaluate your mental health and seek professional help if necessary. Prioritizing your well-being can help you build a strong foundation for future relationships.

Related Article: 13 Signs Your Relationship is in Trouble

5. Temporary Breakups

These types of breakups happen when couples need a short break to reassess their feelings and desires. Time apart can help them realize they truly love someone else and want to be together again. In these cases, the love hasn't faded, and it's likely they will rekindle their relationship.

Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth: Miley and Liam had an on-and-off relationship for almost a decade. They initially met in 2009, got engaged in 2012, and then broke up in 2013. They rekindled their romance in 2016 and got married in 2018. Although they eventually divorced in 2020, their relationship serves as an example of a couple that managed to get back together after a breakup.

Managing a temporary breakup, where love still exists but an event or flare-up has caused a separation, requires care and patience. Here are some tips to help you navigate this situation:

  • Give each other space: Allow both yourself and your ex-partner the time and space needed to process the event or flare-up that led to the breakup. This distance can help you gain new perspectives and insights about the situation and your relationship.
  • Reflect on the situation: Take the time to analyze the event or flare-up that caused the breakup. Identify any underlying issues or patterns in the relationship that may have contributed to the situation.
  • Maintain open communication: Keep the lines of communication open with your ex-partner, discussing your feelings and thoughts about the event and the relationship. Honest and respectful conversations can help maintain a supportive connection and pave the way for potential reconciliation.
  • Set boundaries: Establish clear boundaries during the temporary breakup to protect your emotional well-being and prevent confusion or mixed signals.
  • Focus on personal growth: Use this time to work on self-improvement and address any personal issues or behaviors that may have contributed to the event or flare-up.
  • Seek support: Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist for guidance and emotional support as you navigate this challenging situation.
  • Practice patience and understanding: Recognize that healing and resolving the issues that led to the temporary breakup may take time. Be patient with yourself and your ex-partner during this process.
  • Develop a plan for reconciliation: If both parties are open to rekindling the relationship, create a plan for addressing the issues that led to the breakup and establish strategies for preventing similar situations in the future.
  • Rebuild trust: If the event or flare-up damaged trust in the relationship, work together to rebuild that trust through open communication, honesty, and accountability.
  • Be open to change: If you ultimately decide to get back together, approach the relationship with an open mind and a willingness to adapt. Recognize that both you and your partner may have grown during your time apart, and be prepared to embrace these changes for a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.

6. Married Couples

Married couples who go through a rough patch may temporarily separate but ultimately want to work things out.

If both partners are committed to making amends and putting in the effort, they can find their way back to each other and create a stronger bond.

Pink and Carey Hart: Singer Pink and her husband, Carey Hart, have experienced a couple of breakups throughout their relationship. They first broke up in 2003 and got back together in 2005. They married in 2006, separated in 2008, and then reconciled in 2009 after undergoing marriage counseling. They are still together and have two children.

Relationships can involve breakups and then get back together successfully. There are examples that span across both everyday couples and celebrity relationships all the time. 

While these examples highlight successful reunions after breakups, it's important to remember that every relationship is different.

A trial separation for a married couple experiencing stress but still harboring loving feelings can be a delicate situation. Here are some tips to help navigate this challenging time:

  • Set clear expectations: Before beginning the trial separation, discuss your expectations, goals, and the desired duration of the separation with your spouse. Establishing clear guidelines can help reduce misunderstandings and provide a roadmap for the process.
  • Maintain open communication: Keep the lines of communication open with your spouse throughout the separation. Regularly discuss your feelings, progress, and any challenges you're facing. This can help maintain a supportive connection and facilitate growth.
  • Establish boundaries: Set healthy boundaries during the separation to protect your emotional well-being and create an environment conducive to growth and reflection. This might include limiting the frequency of contact or deciding on specific topics to discuss.
  • Focus on personal growth: Use the time apart to work on self-improvement and address any personal issues or behaviors that may have contributed to the marital stress. Consider seeking individual therapy or engaging in activities that promote emotional growth.
  • Seek professional help: Consider engaging in couples therapy or marriage counseling to address the underlying issues and stressors in your relationship. A professional can provide guidance and tools to help you both navigate the challenges and rebuild a stronger foundation.
  • Develop a support network: Reach out to friends, family, or support groups for guidance and emotional support during the separation. Surrounding yourself with a strong support system can help you cope with the challenges and uncertainties of this period.
  • Reevaluate the relationship: As the trial separation progresses, regularly reassess your feelings and desires for the marriage. Reflect on the progress made and consider whether reconciliation or continuing with the separation is the best course of action.
  • Practice patience and understanding: Recognize that healing and rebuilding a marriage takes time and effort. Be patient with yourself and your spouse as you both work through the challenges and emotions associated with the separation.
  • Create a plan for reconciliation: If you and your spouse decide to reconcile, develop a plan to address the issues that led to the separation and establish strategies for maintaining a healthy, supportive marriage moving forward.
  • Be open to change: If you ultimately decide to reunite, approach the renewed relationship with an open mind and a willingness to adapt. Recognize that both you and your spouse may have grown during the separation, and be prepared to embrace these changes for a healthier, more fulfilling marriage.

What to do after a breakup if you want to get back together

If you're hoping to get back together after a breakup, there are several do's and don'ts to consider. These guidelines can help you navigate the post-breakup period in a healthy and constructive way:

Do this:

  • Give each other space: After a breakup, it's essential to allow both yourself and your ex time and space to process your emotions and gain perspective. This time apart can help you evaluate your relationship and consider if getting back together is genuinely the best decision.
  • Reflect on the reasons for the breakup: Understand the underlying issues that led to the breakup and consider whether they can be resolved. Be honest with yourself about the changes you and your partner need to make for the relationship to work.
  • Focus on personal growth: Use this time apart to work on self-improvement, whether it's emotionally, physically, or mentally. This can help you become a better partner if you do decide to reconcile.
  • Maintain open communication: When you feel ready, initiate a calm and open conversation with your ex about your feelings and thoughts on the relationship. Be willing to listen to their perspective and respect their decision, even if it doesn't align with your desires.
  • Seek professional help: If both parties are willing, consider attending couples' therapy or individual counseling to work through unresolved issues and gain the tools necessary for a healthier relationship.

Don't do this:

  • Don't rush the process: Rebuilding a relationship takes time and effort. Be patient and avoid pushing your ex into a decision before they are ready.
  • Don't engage in manipulative behavior: Refrain from using guilt, jealousy, or other manipulative tactics to get your ex back. This can lead to resentment and an unhealthy dynamic in the relationship.
  • Don't stalk your ex on social media: Constantly checking your ex's social media profiles can be harmful to your mental health and hinder your healing process. Try to limit or avoid checking their profiles during this time.
  • Don't rebound or use jealousy tactics: Jumping into a new relationship or trying to make your ex jealous can backfire and damage any chances of reconciliation.
  • Don't neglect self-care: Make sure you prioritize your physical and emotional wellbeing during this time. Surround yourself with a support system, engage in activities that bring you joy, and practice self-compassion.

While these do's and don'ts can help guide you through the post-breakup period, it's important to remember that each relationship is unique, and there are no guarantees that following these steps will lead to a successful reunion. Focus on personal growth and self-reflection, and be open to the possibility that the best outcome may not involve getting back together.

Related Article: How The 7 Stages of a Breakup | And How to Recover Quickly

Research and studies on reconciliation after breakups

There are several studies and statistics that can provide insights into the chances of couples getting back together after a breakup. While these numbers should not be taken as definitive predictors for individual cases, they can offer a general understanding of post-breakup relationship dynamics:

1. Research by Nancy Kalish, Ph.D., a psychology professor at California State University, Sacramento: Kalish conducted a study on lost love and found that 72% of reunited couples who had been apart for at least five years were still together, while 71% of couples who had been apart for 10 or more years remained together. However, these numbers include both married and unmarried couples.

2. A 2013 study published in the journal "Social Psychological and Personality Science": This study found that 44% of participants had experienced a breakup and subsequent reunion with the same partner. The researchers discovered that couples who got back together tended to have lower relationship satisfaction and commitment levels, along with increased uncertainty about the future of the relationship.

3. Research by psychologist Amber Vennum, Ph.D.: Vennum's study on "cycling" relationships (those that involve breaking up and getting back together) found that such couples experienced higher levels of distress and negative communication patterns. This study conducted by Kansas State University found, 37% of couples who were cohabiting and 23% of spouses had broken up and gotten back together at some point in their relationship. The study also found that such couples reported higher levels of depression and anxiety than those who had never broken up.

Conclusion

Different types of breakups have varying chances of getting back together. Key factors such as mutual respect, love, personal growth, mental health, and commitment play a significant role in determining whether a relationship can be revived. By understanding the nature of your breakup and working on yourself, you can increase the likelihood of a successful reunion with your ex-partner. Remember, seeking professional guidance and support from friends and family can help you navigate this emotional journey.

Also don't forget! One of your most important relationships is with yourself, so be sure to take care of you!

Disclosure: This article was not written by a medical professional, unless specifically stated otherwise. Advice or support content is not intended to be either professional medical or mental health advice or recommendations. All support and advice is from direct and/or anecdotal contributor/author experiences and topic research. If you are experiencing a physical or mental health emergency or mental or physical abuse, please seek professional support. Some of the links in this article may be affiliate links, which can provide compensation to us, at no cost to you when you decide to purchase a reviewed product.

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