What's “My Type”? w/Quiz | & What Your Type Means About You

So you're out grabbing a drink with a new friend of yours. You mention how dating is so much tougher these days and trying to find a guy you really vibe with seems impossible.

She's totally understands and wants to help you out.

So she asks you, "What's your type?"

You pause for a second. The first thing that pops into your head is the classic, tall, dark, and handsome, response, but you know that's not your real answer. Come to think of it, you're having trouble thinking how to answer.

Your “type” is more than just looks or personality - it’s a mix of what attracts you physically, emotionally, mentally, and even socially.

It includes many things that you consciously, and even sub-consciously desire, like sense of humor, body type, financial situation, goals, interests, and lifestyle. One way to describe it is imagining your brain and heart working together to imagine your perfect match - and who’s a mismatch.

We have a bunch of things to show you, and YES, there is a What's My Type? Quiz at the end. If you want to go straight to the quiz then just jump to the end of the article or if you want to save everything for later, then go ahead and PIN IT below.

Topics Summary:

• What Drives Your Type Feelings?
• Important Type Traits
• How Your Type is Determined
• What Your Type Says About You!
• What is My Type Quiz! At the end!

Things That Influence Your Type

Having a type isn't just some random thing, and it's definitely not the same for everyone. That's because it's shaped by a mix of internal wiring, life experiences, and outside influences. From how you were raised to the movies you love, these are some of the key areas that are probably steering your preferences in dating.

• Looks & Body Type: Yes, physical attraction matters. You might be drawn to certain builds, facial features, or style - what “looks good” to you is often based on your biology and social conditioning.
• Emotional Blueprint: Attachment styles deeply affect how we relate to people. If you’re used to chaos or emotional distance, your type might lean towards guys that reflect these states, that is, until you heal and grow.
• Personality Patterns: Maybe you're consistently attracted to the shy introvert or the dominant leader. Why? Their energy either complements or mirrors something in you.
• Money & Work Ethic: How a person handles money and approaches work can be a major attraction or vibe killer. If you're ambitious, then someone with no drive or goals might be a deal-breaker, even if he's rocking a six-pack.
• Cultural and Media Influence: Our ideas of attractiveness are shaped by movies, shows, influencers, and friends. That’s why preferences like “funny,” “fit,” or “mysterious” get so normalized.

When it comes to discovering your type of guy, it’s helpful to understand the difference between traits that are essential and those that are more about preference, also important, but not nearly as heavily weighted.

Your Primary Traits are the non-negotiables - the values or characteristics that align with you as a person and what you need in a relationship. Without these, the connection just wouldn't feel right.

Your Secondary Traits are the qualities that are nice to have but aren’t deal-breakers. The absence of these traits doesn’t necessarily lead to incompatibility.

Primary Traits (Non-Negotiables)

These are the things most people naturally prioritize when it comes to who they date seriously. Think compatibility!

• Physical attraction / body type
• Emotional connection / availability
• Personality compatibility
• Shared goals (career, lifestyle, values)
• Financial responsibility
• Communication style
• Sexual compatibility
• Sense of humor
• Similar or supportive work/life balance
• Food preferences / lifestyle (e.g. vegan, foodie, eats out vs. home-cooked)

Secondary Traits (Nice-to-Haves)

These add color and value to a relationship, making it richer or more enjoyable, but they aren't essential for it to thrive.

• Hobbies & Interests: Dancing, fitness, gaming, reading, art, music
• Movies & TV taste: A shared love of binge-watching or going to the theater
• Vacation styles: Relaxing on a beach vs. hiking up a mountain
• Dancing: Fun for those who see movement and rhythm as a shared joy
• Friend time / Alone time balance: Do you both value social circles? How do you recharge?
• Friend group compatibility: Can your social lives blend? Do you enjoy spending time with their people?

Related Articles:

Relationship Attachment Styles |  Which One Works Best For You?

Compatibility Test | 15 Questions When You Start Dating Someone New

Intentional Dating | How To Find Your Perfect Match

6 Steps to Get a Boyfriend | Say Bye to Being Single

12 Steps for How to Get a Girlfriend | Mastering the Skills to Find Love

Relationship, Friendship, or Just a Fling?

Naturally, your type will be impacted significantly depending on the level of commitment you're ready to purse in a relationship, or perhaps, lack of. We never said figuring out your type was relegated to a long-term committed relationship.

Certainly, you may have a type in mind for that, but you could also be a little more or less picky in certain areas when you're just "shopping around".

Maybe you're craving the ease and companionship of a friendship, where the stakes are lower but the connection is still meaningful?

Understanding your own commitment level can help guide your choices and set clear expectations, ensuring that you’re aligned with what both you and your potential partner are ready for.

• Friendship: Based on connection, trust, and shared interests—but not romantic or sexual attraction.
• FWB: There’s physical intimacy but without the expectations of a relationship. Still requires emotional maturity.
• Hookup: Short-term, casual, often based mostly on physical attraction.
• Relationship: Includes emotional, mental, and often physical intimacy with shared life goals and long-term vision.

Knowing what you're looking for (and being honest about it) helps avoid confusion or hurt.

How "My Type?" Quizzes Work

Ever wonder how a quiz is supposed to know what's in your head and heart when it comes figuring out your type?

Personality-style quizzes (like "What’s Your Type of Guy?") use a clever mix of psychological profiling, pattern recognition, and self-reflection prompts, designed to uncover your preferences and tendencies - even if it’s just for fun.

These are some of the "my type" quiz design basics:

1. Your Answer Patterns Reveal Preferences

Each question is structured with multiple-choice answers that map to different personality "types". These types are the known personality archetypes we commonly see with men and women.

• A = Creative Soul
• B = Ambitious Alpha
• C = Thoughtful Intellectual
• D = Charming Rebel
• E = Gentle Healer

By tallying your answers, it can infer which archetype you are most aligned with.

2. The Question Categories Tap Into Your Core Personality Drivers

The questions are intentionally varied and often include:

The Category Purpose

• Lifestyle Choices - To determine what kind of energy or pace you vibe with.
• Emotional Preferences - To assess your emotional needs and how you connect.
• Attraction Triggers - To surface subconscious or physical preferences.
• Values & Dealbreakers - To identify what matters to you most in a relationship.
• Imagination/Projection - To see how you envision romance or your ideal partner long-term.

So even a seemingly casual question like "What’s your dream vacation?" is really asking:

• Do you prefer luxury, adventure, introspection, or connection?
• That preference often links back to a deeper emotional need or attraction type.

3. Forcing You Into a Choice = Insight Into Yourself

By offering a clear and distinct answer choices, the quiz nudges you to make small, personal judgments - essentially choosing between different core values or aesthetic attractions. This is just like real psychological assessments (like MBTI or Enneagram), only simplified.

4. Archetypes Are Based on Relatable Patterns

The “types” at the end are built from archetypal male traits that reflect real-world romantic dynamics - each tied to a recognizable personality cluster.

These archetypes let you project your feelings, experiences, and fantasies onto a clear "type" that represents the guy you're naturally drawn to.

Some guy types are:

• "Creative Soul" = emotional depth, imagination, vulnerability
• "Ambitious Alpha" = drive, leadership, security
• "Charming Rebel" = charisma, unpredictability, excitement
• "Gentle Healer" = emotional availability, kindness, nurturing
• "Thoughtful Intellectual" = depth, mystery, stimulation

Quiz Logic: Question-by-Question Breakdown

Shhh... Here's a little insight into what the quiz questions are really getting at!

“What’s most important to you in a relationship?”

Really asking: What emotional need or core value defines love for you?

• “Feeling emotionally connected” - You prioritize intimacy and deep bonds (Lover or Healer archetype).
• “Building a future together” - You value structure and partnership (Ruler or King).
• “Having fun and laughing” - You need playfulness and levity (Jester or Explorer).

“When you picture your ideal partner, they are…”

Really asking: What archetype or energy are you attracted to most?

• “Strong, protective, and in control” - You’re drawn to masculine, anchoring energy (Protector, King, or Warrior).
• “Creative, emotional, and artistic” - You desire soulful connection (Creator or Lover).
• “Intellectual and mysterious” - You seek insight and depth (Sage or Mystic).

“How do you like to be treated when you’re feeling vulnerable?”

Really asking: What does your nervous system equate with emotional safety?

• “I want someone to listen and validate me” - You value empathy, likely have anxious or secure attachment.
• “I want space to process on my own” - You may be more independent or have avoidant tendencies.
• “I want to be distracted and cheered up” - You use humor or escape to avoid pain (Jester, Rebel).

“What type of chemistry do you crave?”

Really asking: What kind of erotic or emotional polarity excites you?

• “Intense, passionate, can’t-keep-hands-off” - Shadow Lover or high-sensuality pairings.
• “Playful and teasing” - You enjoy flirtation and emotional lightness (Jester).
• “Spiritual or emotional depth” - You crave soulful bonds (Mystic, Healer, or Sage).

“What makes you feel most loved?”

Really asking: What is your love language + emotional fulfillment style?

• “Physical affection” - You're body-oriented and crave intimacy (Lover).
• “Words of affirmation” - You need to feel seen and validated (Idealist, Romantic).
• “Acts of service” - Loyalty and action matter more than words (Protector or Caregiver).

“Which relationship dynamic feels most familiar or appealing?”

Really asking: What relational role-play or pattern are you drawn to?

• “I want to be nurtured and guided” - You crave a dominant masculine presence (King/Protector).
• “I want an equal partner and best friend” - Balance and stability matter to you (Ruler/Sage combo).
• “I like unpredictability and passion” - You may have trauma bonds or be drawn to drama (Rebel or Shadow Lover).

“What kind of conversations turn you on?”

Really asking: How do you connect mentally or emotionally?

• “Deep, vulnerable talks” - You want emotional attunement (Healer or Sage).
• “Playful banter” - You bond through humor (Jester energy).
• “Goal-setting, planning” - You align through ambition (Ruler or Warrior).

“In conflict, you prefer a partner who…”

Really asking: How do you handle emotional regulation and power dynamics?

• “Listens and stays calm” - You crave emotional safety and maturity (Sage/Healer).
• “Takes control and handles it” - You want masculine leadership (King/Warrior).
• “Leaves me alone to cool off” - You avoid intensity (likely avoidant or independent).

“When you’re with someone, you want to feel…”

Really asking: What’s your primary relational desire?

• “Seen and adored” - You want to feel special (Lover or Queen archetype).
• “Safe and steady” - Stability is your need (Protector or Ruler).
• “Inspired and creative” - You're drawn to shared growth (Creator or Explorer).

“What’s your favorite way to spend time with a partner?”

Really asking: What lifestyle or bonding style do you desire?

• “Netflix and cuddles” - You value comfort, intimacy (Lover, Caregiver).
• “Trying new experiences” - You crave novelty (Explorer, Rebel).
• “Working on creative projects together” - Shared purpose drives you (Creator or Ruler).

“What role do you usually take in relationships?”

Really asking: What is your own dominant archetypal energy?

• “I lead and protect” - You’re in King, Warrior, or Ruler energy.
• "I nurture and care” - You’re a Caregiver, Queen, or Mother archetype.
• “I inspire and seduce” - You’re a Muse, Lover, or Mystic.

“When you're upset, you want your partner to…”

Really asking: What’s your coping style and emotional expectation?

• “Let me vent and just hold space” - You value emotional presence (Healer/Sage).
• “Fix it for me or take action” - You want decisiveness and leadership (King/Warrior).
• “Say something sweet or funny” - You deflect intensity with lightness (Jester or avoidant types).

“In past relationships, you’ve often felt…”

Really asking: What’s your relational wound or recurring pattern?

• “Unseen or emotionally neglected” - You may attract emotionally unavailable types (Sage/Rebel).
• “Used or unappreciated” - You over-give or become the healer (Caregiver).
• “Controlled or stifled” - You value freedom and may attract dominants (Ruler mismatch).

“What kind of future do you picture with your ideal partner?”

Really asking: What’s your relationship vision or alignment need?

• “Building a home, family, legacy” - You want rooted, loyal love (Ruler, Caregiver).
• “Adventuring, discovering, growing” - You crave expansion (Explorer, Rebel).
• “Creating something meaningful” - Purposeful passion (Creator, Sage, Lover).

“What’s your biggest fear in love?”

Really asking: What is your attachment wound or shadow?

• ‍“Being abandoned” - Anxious attachment or childhood rejection wound.
• ‍“Being controlled” - Fear of losing independence; avoidant or Rebel energy.
• ‍“Being emotionally hurt” - Often shut-down Lovers or burned Mystics.

“What kind of emotional energy feels most comforting?”

Really asking: What soothes your system on a soul level?

• ‍“Calm, grounded presence” - You crave inner peace (Sage, Protector).
• ‍“Expressive and emotionally warm” - You want intimacy and connection (Lover/Healer).
• ‍“Strong and directive” - You feel safest with structure (Warrior/King).

“When things get hard, you want a partner who…”

Really asking: What do you expect from your partner in times of pressure?

• ‍“Takes charge” - You trust strength and action (Ruler, Warrior).
• ‍“Holds space and listens” - Emotional presence is key (Sage, Healer).
• ‍“Distracts me with love or laughter” - You may avoid pain (Jester or Explorer).

“Which fantasy feels most aligned?”

Really asking: What is your idealized love story or archetypal narrative?

• “Healing each other through love” - Soulmate/healer energy.
• “Wild, passionate chaos” - Shadow Lover or Rebel fantasy.
• “Rising in power or purpose together” - Ruler/Queen dynamic.

“In relationships, do you tend to…”

Really asking: What’s your natural polarity and self-expression?

• ‍“Take the lead” - You’re in your masculine archetype (Warrior, King).
• ‍“Offer support and emotional care” - Feminine archetype (Healer, Mother, Mystic).
• ‍“Retreat into my world” - Lone-wolf or introspective energy (Sage, Mystic).

“Your biggest relationship wound or lesson has been…”

Really asking: What is your core pattern in love that wants healing?

• “Giving too much and losing myself” - Caregiver or Lover imbalance.
• “Not being seen or chosen” - Queen or Mystic seeking validation.
• “Attracting emotionally unavailable people” - Repetition compulsion based on shadow work (often inner child stuff).

Finally! What does your type actually say about you? Come on, you know we go all in and cover all the juicy stuff.

What Your “Type” of Guy Says About You

Here’s the deeper tea - there's more to your “type” than just who you like. It’s often a mirror reflecting what you desire, value, or need in yourself.

After you determine what "Your Type Quiz Results" are, see what it could mean about you!

‍If you’re into the Creative Soul:

• You value emotional expression, depth, and beauty.
• You likely see the world romantically or poetically.
• Might be a bit idealistic or drawn to mystery over logic.
• You crave soul connections and want someone who "gets" you emotionally.

You’re probably intuitive, empathetic, and imaginative - maybe even a little sensitive or dreamy yourself.

If you go for the Ambitious Alpha:

• You crave stability, drive, and shared success.
• You may admire leadership and confidence - maybe because you embody that or desire it.
• Security and elevation (financial, emotional, lifestyle) matter to you.

You’re likely ambitious, goal-oriented, high-value, and want someone who can match or exceed your pace.

If the Thoughtful Intellectual is your type:

• You’re all about mental stimulation and emotional intelligence.
• You’re likely introspective, analytical, and need depth over flash.
• Authenticity and curiosity turn you on more than surface charisma.

You’re probably a reflective, deep-feeling person who values meaning and self-awareness.

If the Charming Rebel gets you going:

• You want excitement, chemistry, and unpredictability.
• You might love the thrill or are drawn to emotionally unavailable types.
• There’s a desire for freedom, intensity, and magnetism.

You’re likely passionate, adventurous, spontaneous - and possibly working through patterns around chaos and emotional risk.

If you're into the Gentle Healer:

• You seek emotional safety, vulnerability, and a peaceful love.
• You’re probably healing from past wounds or value inner peace deeply.
• You want someone emotionally attuned who brings softness into your life.

You’re likely nurturing, spiritual, sensitive, and deeply compassionate. You may have a strong desire to be truly seen.‍

FYI on ARCHETYPE MATCHING: Who Clicks, Who Clashes?

We couldn't finish things up without getting into some traditionally good and not so good personality match-ups. People used to always say opposites attract, but there's way more involved in attraction, and often common interests and complimenting each other makes for a strong connection.

Archetypal attraction is often about polarity: balancing energies (masculine/feminine, grounded/wild, giving/receiving). But some combos can get…messy.

Relationship Archetypes (Psych + Love/Attachment Oriented)

These reflect how people show up in romantic or emotional relationships:

The Protector: Strong, dependable Wants: to keep their partner safe.

‍The Muse: Inspires creativity Brings: beauty and passion.

‍The Healer: Empathic, soothing Helps: others heal emotional wounds.

‍The Wild One: Unpredictable, thrilling Adds: adventure and chaos.

‍The Shadow Lover: Intense, magnetic Deep passion, but might be toxic.

‍The Twin Flame: Reflective, challenging Feels like destiny, but can be intense.

‍The Soulmate: Stable, supportive Emotional and spiritual connection.

‍The Teacher: Growth-oriented Helps partner evolve or awaken.

BEST MATCHES for High Chemistry and Long-Term Potential

Archetype Best Match(es) Why It Works

‍The Lover The Protector or Healer Passion + safety = trust + spark

‍The Warrior The Queen or Mystic Strength + sovereignty or softness

‍The Sage The Creator or Caregiver Wisdom + inspiration or nurturing

‍The Rebel The Huntress or Lover Chaos + freedom = excitement

‍The Healer The Wounded Hero or Lover Healing + openness = intimacy

‍The King The Queen Power couple energy, shared vision

Potentially RISKY MATCHES

Archetype Clashing Match Why It’s Tough

‍The Rebel The Caregiver Rebel may resist being “saved”

‍The Sage The Jester Sage wants depth, Jester avoids it

‍The Lover The Warrior Lover wants softness, Warrior can be too rigid

‍The Creator The Ruler Vision vs. control = creative clashes

‍The Healer The Rebel Healer wants peace, Rebel seeks chaos

‍The Queen The Challenger Both strong-willed = power struggle

The Final Word

Always remember that as you grow your "type" is also likely to shift, even just a bit. Those traits that were more important, like physical appearance or careers, can become less important if you become completely self-sufficient on your own and you realize long-term happiness is more about internal qualities than external.

Valuing lifestyle and personality alignment - like whether you both enjoy food trucks or fine dining, quiet nights or dancing, or simply being able to sit, talk, and laugh or share quiet time together...effortlessly.

And sometimes? The right match surprises you completely - they’re not what you expected in looks, but they feel exactly right.

Quiz | What's Your Type?

Start the Quiz now and find out - who truly fits your vibe!